I know that you must want to kick my ass the moment you see this log.

我知道当你一看到这篇日志时一定很想把我揍飞。

Today, I received a phone call from the number of a "single" guy I met online. It was his wife, who is three months pregnant. She threatened to kick my ass.

今天，我收到一个电话，是一个我在网上遇到的“单身”网友的老婆打来的，她已经怀孕三个月了，威胁说要揍我。

Not just "check email" but "write chapter in my novel" or "write that kick-ass blog post I've been planning" or "write that new Android app".

不仅是“浏览邮件”，而且“要写出有创见的小说章节”，或“发人深省的博客，”或“编写新的软件程序”等。

Have you given my daughter a little package to remember you by now that the war is over and you know America will kick your ass back to your village full of shit in Sicily?

你有没有使我的女儿明白，现在战争结束了，美国会把你踢回你在西西里岛上那个充满粪便的村庄？